she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
