He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
