Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
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