do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
