the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
