So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
