I look better un-naked...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
