I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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