what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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