Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
