Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
