He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
