I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
