id be glad to
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
so much tequila, so little girl.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
