i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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