oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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