dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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