my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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