google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
