so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize