Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
