what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
