But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
