Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
wow bdsm is so cute
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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