pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
