Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
