Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It's never too late to be topless.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
