Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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