Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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