Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
