We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
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