i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Houston, we have a squirter
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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