***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
