wakey wakey hands off snakey
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Randomize
