I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
