i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
