Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
