You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
My nipple is on Facebook.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize