i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
your like the ambassador to my penis.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
