Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
