I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
