I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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