yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
