What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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