Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
