who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
