i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
