thus making me awesome and them whores
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
