i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
