He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Success! We fucked roommates!
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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