No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
She needs sedatives and a leash
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Randomize
